Hello... Hello... Hello... Is There Anybody In There?

Hello everyone.

It has been quite some time since I ran my mouth off here on the ol' blogosphere.  Since the 13th of October, 2010, to be specific.  I suppose I owe you some kind of explanation....

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Any-who, a lot has gone down since I wrote my last blog post.  Here is some info about some of it:

School:

I got "straight A's" at school last semester, which was awesome, because that was literally my fifth attempt at college and my ego really couldn't sustain another wasted semester in which I withdraw from classes half-way through because I was either too high, too lazy, or too arrested.  

This semester, I think I'll just get "straight A's" again... it just seems easier that way.  I'm not trying to brag about my grades or anything, either.  I think a trained monkey could get straight A's in most classes where I'm in school.  A lot of the work and class time is really really easy.  Case in point: in my Philosophy class last semester, while learning about Aristotle's "Four Causes," the teacher gave us some Play Doh brand modeling compound and had us make little sculptures with it.  This was supposed to help us "visualize" the Four Causes better, or something.  It was wildly reminiscent of kindergarten, however, and it felt a little bit wasteful.  

I constructed a Play Doh "Baby Jesus."

Oh Come All Ye Faithful

Needless to say, I am hopeful that my classes this semester will be a little less elementary.  And, to be fair, my english class last semester really was extremely difficult, and I was the only one out of a class of about 20 or 25 to receive an "A," which made me feel a limited measure of pride.

Home:

I am still living in Longmont with my hot and spicy girlfriend Jera who lights up my life.  Also my lazy cat Maggie who doesn't light up much of anything.  We did, however, discover recently that Maggie likes bacon and lettuce, which was a surprise to me because I have never in the past been able to get this cat to eat any human food.  Since she likes lettuce and bacon, the next step is to give her some toast and some tomato. If she likes those, then I'm replacing her "Purina" brand cat litter...

The Food Maggie Eats

With BLT'S....

My Cat Attacking a Family of BLT's in the Wild

Not much else going on on the "home front."  It's, like, a babillion degrees below zero outside.  Oh, and we recently got Netflix.  I called Netflix and told them how much I was enjoying their awesome streaming video product (particularly their vast array of documentaries,) and they were so thrilled with my response that they decided to make one of their little internet banner ads based on our story.  Here it is:

If you think their banner advertising is vulgar,

you should try talking to these guys on the phone.

I kept telling them, I don't even know what a "Titty-Farmer-Shit-Bag" IS!

Internet:

So I discovered, during the brief interval I have been away, the dark dark world of 4Chan.org.  Mom, if you are reading this, there is no need for you to follow that link.  Really, anyone with morals, or anyone over the age of twenty-five, is probably going to want to avoid clicking that link.  Anyone else, though, give yourself a few minutes to go to that message board site, and particularly their "Random," board.  There are some sick sick children in there.  Hilarious, but sick.  Incidentally, the guys posting all the porn and LOLcats and counterfeit cigarette manufacturer coupons at 4Chan are also responsible for the internet group "Anonymous," which has been in the news recently for doing things like fucking with Tunisia's computer systems during their recent uprising, and taking down the systems of companies that aimed to cripple the whistleblower website Wikileaks.  It's a bizarre mix of hateful and lonely sixteen year old pot-heads, genuine pedophiles, and people who are legitimately intelligent with internet security and use their know-how to advance certain causes that don't seem to follow a particular ideology.

This is my terrible drawing of what I looked like discovering 4Chan.

So I'm trying to ween myself off of 4Chan for now, unless I see that "Anonymous" is in the news again, in which case I like to drop by and see what the word is.  

Other internet news: I logged onto Facebook today for the first time in a long time.  They changed the page around again for some fuck-tarded reason.  They are becoming better at invading privacy and consolidating money and power at a geometric rate (like the computers in Terminator 2).  Mark Zuckerberg, king of the pubic-wig-fairies, and the movie they made about him (which I have declined to see because it attempts to legitimize Justin Timberlake as both an actor and a human, when he is very clearly a blight of herpes on humanity, and not human at all,) have ballooned out of control.  

A great photo of Justin Timberlake

I keep wondering if Facebook is going to be around five years from now, or ten years from now.  There is something increasingly distasteful about the whole thing, although I'll be goddamned if I could put my finger right on it.  Anyway, point is that I logged back on today and found that I had missed a bunch of stuff:

It makes me want to log in to Facebook compulsively just to avoid

having stuff pile up like this.

I also got several e-mails from people kindly saying that they liked my blog, or at least that it didn't make them want to poke their eyes out with fishsticks.  Some of the e-mails were written out of concern for my health, since I seemed to have dropped off of the face of the planet.  But, amazingly, despite all of my trying, I could not find the edge of the Earth from which to fall off, and even more amazingly, I still have a good number of "followers" around here.  I wonder if anyone will read this, after I inadvertently betrayed you all by leaving for months without notice....?

Transplants:

The biggest news I have for you all is that shortly before Christmas, my father finally got the kidney transplant that he was needing with increasing desperation.  I don't think I have ever written much here about my father's health, but I am certain he doesn't mind, so I will tell you that he had a liver transplant a few years back because he has Hepatitis C which was badly damaging his liver.  But, during the course of that period of time, having had a nearly incapacitated liver for a couple of years, his kidneys also sustained significant damage while trying to compensate for the liver.  So it became necessary for him to get a kidney.

Now, while I really did offer him my kidney, I don't think my kidneys are in optimal condition anyway, and there were some other prohibitive factors.  But I did offer.

Anyway....

I just have this to say to everyone: advocate for blood and tissue donor awareness, and make sure your driver's license says that you are an organ donor.  You can't imagine what it felt like to our family the day my dad got his liver those years back.  It was bittersweet, knowing that someone died before the liver could be my dad's, but it was a miraculous feeling nonetheless.  And what is even better is that, when my dad needed another organ, another one presented itself.

The kidney came out of my sister, Margaret.

On a personal note, I'd like to tell Margaret again, if she is reading this: Marg, you are a hero.  You are my hero.  You have what they call "balls of steel" and a heart as big as all the world.  I am proud of you and awed by you and eternally grateful to you for helping our father live.  I love you.  

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I love you so much that I'm going to put a nice picture of you right here on my blog for everyone to see.

She looks great, even fifteen minutes after MAJOR surgery!

In my humble opinion, the family is the most important thing.  I am so happy that the surgeries went well, and I hope that my father and sister know how much I love them.  You guys are the best.  (Mom too.)

One more picture of Marg, with Dad.

Blog:

So I am going to try to start blogging again.  I can't promise daily blogs, but I think two or three times per week would be in the realm of possibility.  But it's all really up to you guys out there (if anyone reads this in the first place).  Should I start blogging again?  Or should I jettison the entirety of this blog into the great cloud-computing trashcan in the sky?  I really enjoyed blogging when I was doing it with some consistency, and I can't promise brilliance with every blog, but if you guys will have me back, I'm here.

Also: tell me what to write about.  Otherwise I'll just end up writing about blow-drying my wang-chung and wiping my ass with warm moist washcloths again.  Unless that's what you all want, in which case my next blog will probably be about the phenomenon known as "SWASS," or "sweaty ass syndrome (with an extra 's')."  In addition to SWASS, there's also "SWALLS," which has to do with my balls,  which relates back to the blow-drying.  So you guys let me know.  I've missed you.  I don't require that any of you missed me, but if a couple of you had, it would make it a lot easier for me to stop eating an entire tub of Nestle's Pre-Fabricated Cookie Dough per day.  

I'm really depressed without you.

Love.