Anti Drug Ads = Hilarious (or Evil)

A billboard I see frequently in Northern Colorado:



And here's one from Montana:



Now, I'm aware that my status as a recovering drug addict may skew my viewpoint here a little bit... so please correct me if I am wrong. But this shit is hilarious. Cartoonishly stupid.

I don't mean to cheapen the experience of anyone who has encountered either of the situations mentioned here. I am just saying that, by and large, these are events that happen a lot less than the billboards would suggest. I see that they want to put a doom and gloom spin on the whole meth thing, but the thing is that (as far as common sense tells me) people lose their virginity 90% of the time before they ever roll a bowl. Also: a resourceful tweaker (especially one with the stereotypically young, attractive, innocent looks of the one in the Montana billboard), would have no problem making bank as a craigslist escort. That girl wouldn't get out of bed for $15 if she was resourceful. And believe you me, meth addicts are the most resourceful people in the world. You wouldn't believe the things that can be accomplished by a tweaker, a few grams, a couple hours and a roll of duct tape. (Also, if you refer to my previous blog, you will see that they can be quite artistic as well. Cute.)

I just don't find these ads to be in the realm of reality. If I am wrong, then please correct me. But wouldn't we serve our youth better by telling them the truth about methamphetamine and it's risks? I know this is rehash material for most people, but I believe that when you lie to people about the dangers of a drugs and the lifestyle associated with it, and they end up trying the drug anyway cause they are drunk and have a had a really shitty couple weeks at work, and they go into the bathroom and pull a couple lines of some real good shit, and they realize that the dope is actually kind of FUN (the first time) and that life for the most part goes on as usual afterwards, they subsequently lose all faith in the governing apparatus that sold them the bunk information in the first place.

Nothing they taught me in the DARE program was accurate. I would have rather them been straight up with me. Like, I can't imagine how may times I heard in my childhood that one hit of ecstasy can kill you. The likelihood of this shit happening puts it outside the bounds of what should be publicly disseminated as fact.

Which brings us to the next rehash point: maybe the government shouldn't be cramming this shit down our throats in the first place? Maybe it's a parent's place to tell their kid: "don't do meth, you little bastard, it will make you act like an idiot and you may end up listening to the Insane Clown Posse religiously. Plus the man will arrest you for it."

Which brings us to the NEXT rehash point: maybe the man should shove it up his ass. Maybe people should make their own decision about whether or not to slam dope into their arm in the privacy of their own home because it makes sex feel way way crazy. (second hand info here. I never used intravenously.) Maybe we could use that money that we spend incarcerating these folks, paying the cops, paying the lawyers, paying for damages caused by dope related crime, paying for inefficient government ran treatment facilities and patrolling an uncontrollable Mexican-US border on something useful like... welfare and international war-fronts?

Ha ha. Just kidding. Like homes and clothes and TV's and playstations and food and college tuition and things. You know... the kind of stuff the breeds happiness, prosperity, and intelligence.

I dunno... I just really have a stupid day every time I have to start it by seeing one of these stupid ass billboards on the way to work. Thank god I don't have cable, cause I'm certain they must have some real asinine TV spots to go along with this campaign, right?

Anyone else with me on this?

(P.S. 61 days since my last pill, drink, line. or bowl! WOO!)